It was April. Just a couple of days after her birthday. She had prayed and hoped for no phone calls from him this year. And she was glad that he didn’t. Although the awkwardness of him not wishing her on her birthday was a little too much, she coaxed her heart and made herself believe that it was happening for the better, for with his one phone call, she would jump back to square one in no little time.
Just when she started getting ready for office, it started drizzling. She loved monsoons. But hated going out in rains. However, the stern warning from her manager to be on time that day for the new presentation, made her go out in the rain itself. As she waited in the bus stop for her office bus to arrive, a familiar voice whispered from behind,
She looked around. It was him. The ground under her feet had already started collapsing. She wanted to run away, initially. After a little while, she wanted to hug him and cry. Then she wanted to slap him for breaking her asymmetrically into little pieces and scarring her for a lifetime. But all she did was stare at him in awe, admiring the brown hair and the mole above the right side of his upper lip.
“Waiting for your bus?”
“Late login today? You usually leave by 7.”
“What hmm Shabnam? Talk to me na. Please.”, and he made his cute puppy face.
“I don’t have anything to talk to you. My bus will arrive in no time. And please cut your hair.”
“Yeah that’s like my baby.”
“Your baby is dead Sagnik.”
“Shabnam, you knew I had my reasons, right? Why have you blocked me on WhatsApp and Facebook?”
“Reasons? Yeah. You fell in love with her. So you left me. So you left your best friend. Did you for once, think what I would do without you? I had forgotten my way back home by then. I did not know where to go without you. And all you did was rummage my brain and throw me away, saying, “Shabnam is my best friend, and she will be okay with it.” And now, after one complete year, when I am finally trying my best to be okay with it, you are here with your own set of reasons. Why Sagnik? What did I do to receive this tremendous amount of pain that I go through every single second of the day? And I had to block you. I did not want to see your pictures with her on Facebook and WhatsApp every now and then. Sagnik, I need no explanations from you. Let me be.”
“Shabnam step inside first it’s raining like crazy you will catch a cold. I remember what happens to you when you catch a cold.”
“Oh really! Tell me what else do you remember about me.”
“Stop killing me with your sarcasm. Even you are dating that guy from your office.”
“Yes. I am.”
“So? Am I reacting the way you are? People do move on Shabnam. You took time. But you did move on isn’t it?”
“Yeah. I moved on. Except that I still look for that mole somewhere, sometimes. It’s just that I never let him buy the deo that you use. It’s just that some nights, I still open the old green diary and tears don’t listen to me. It’s just that some days, I unblock you, check your dp, your status, your last seen, and smile for you. It’s just that your happiness is still the first one on my list. It’s just that tonight, I won’t be able to work in office normally, and tomorrow morning, I will bleed in your memories.”
“Shabnam. I am sorry. Please don’t cry.”
“Bye Sagnik.”, she said and stepped on the bus.
“Shabnam. I miss my best friend.”
He smiled and went back.
“I miss you.”
She whispered amidst tears.
Featured photo via skymetweather.com